12 Reasons Why EMDR Therapy DOES Not Work — And How to Fix It

EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) is one of the most powerful trauma therapies available. It’s backed by research, endorsed by therapists worldwide, and changing lives. But let’s be honest — EMDR therapy doesn’t work for everyone, every time.

If you’ve tried EMDR (or even online EMDR therapy) and walked away wondering, “Why didn’t this work for me?” — you’re not alone. The good news? Most of the time, it’s fixable.

Here are 12 reasons EMDR therapy might not be working — and what you can do about it.

1. You’re Not Fully Emotionally Activated

EMDR works by processing painful, stuck memories. If you’re numb, emotionally disconnected, or “just talking,” the real work won’t happen.
💡 Fix: Let your therapist know. A skilled EMDR therapist will adjust and help you connect — safely — even in online EMDR sessions.

2. Your Therapist Lacks Proper EMDR Training

EMDR is complex. A therapist without deep training might rush the process or miss key steps — leaving you frustrated.
💡 Fix: Ask about EMDRIA-approved training. Real EMDR requires more than weekend workshops — especially for virtual EMDR therapy.

3. Your Therapist Skipped Resourcing

Jumping into trauma work without preparation is a recipe for overwhelm. Resourcing teaches you how to self-soothe before diving in.
💡 Fix: If you don’t feel prepared, pause processing. Resourcing is mandatory, not optional.

4. You’re Targeting the Wrong Memory

If the wrong memory is targeted, EMDR stalls. Often, the real trauma sits further back than you realize.
💡 Fix: Work with your therapist to find the root — not just what feels obvious.

5. The Bilateral Stimulation (BLS) Doesn’t Fit You

Eye movements, tapping, sounds — not every BLS method works for every brain.
💡 Fix: Try different BLS styles. Many online EMDR platforms offer options. Don’t settle if something feels off.

6. You’re Dissociating (Checking Out)

If you “leave” the room emotionally, EMDR stops working. Dissociation is common but fixable.
💡 Fix: Let your therapist know. They’ll teach grounding tools to help you stay present.

7. You Have Complex Trauma, But It’s Not Being Handled Correctly

EMDR can absolutely work for complex trauma — but it takes specialized skill, pacing, and patience.
💡 Fix: Work with someone who gets complex PTSD. Processing layer by layer is key — especially for online EMDR therapy.

8. There’s No Real Connection with Your Therapist

No trust = no healing. EMDR only works if you feel safe, understood, and respected.
💡 Fix: Trust your gut. If it’s not working, find someone you click with.

9. You’re Expecting Instant Results

EMDR is powerful — but it’s not a quick fix. Some sessions bring relief fast, others take time.
💡 Fix: Set realistic expectations and stay consistent.

10. You’re Not Fully Bought In

Skepticism is normal — but full-on disbelief? That can block progress. EMDR requires engagement.
💡 Fix: Share your doubts. Good therapists will meet you where you’re at — and explain the science.

11. You’re Overwhelmed Outside of Therapy (NEW)

If your day-to-day life is chaotic — toxic relationships, chronic stress, or burnout — your nervous system might be too overloaded to process trauma in session.
💡 Fix: Address current stressors first. Sometimes EMDR needs to wait until your system has enough bandwidth to handle the work.

12. You’re Not Closing Your EMDR Sessions Properly (NEW)

Good EMDR work doesn’t end with the last set of eye movements. Without proper closure — like calming exercises and debriefing — you can leave sessions raw, emotional, and unfinished.
💡 Fix: Make sure your therapist builds in time to close each session. If you’re doing online EMDR therapy, this is especially important.

The Bottom Line: EMDR Works — But Only If Done Right

If EMDR therapy hasn’t worked for you, it doesn’t mean you’re “unfixable.” It means something in the process is off — and the right therapist can help you course-correct.

Done well — whether in-person or through online EMDR therapy — EMDR helps you move past trauma instead of carrying it.

Ready to Try EMDR Therapy the Right Way?

If you’re ready to experience EMDR the way it’s meant to work — personalized, paced, and actually effective — I’d love to help.

👉 Email me for a free EMDR consultation — therapizeyourlife@gmail.com